Filled with Gratitude and Reverence…

Wow. My week at Villa Sumaya in Guatemala has been unreal. Truly a completely immersive experience for the senses, the nervous system, and the body! I haven’t felt this much alive and like my true self in many years. The last time that I traveled to Guatemala, I had an equally impactful trip-but in such a different way. There’s something about this land and the ancient Mayan roots that are tied here. I’m so grateful that my dear friend, Alora, suggested we join her yoga teacher for his first ever retreat in this magical place.

The week was powerful to say the least. When I heard ‘yoga retreat’, I thought we would be doing a couple flows a day, journaling, maybe a cacao ceremony and a massage or facial treatment and eating simple vegetarian meals. Maybe we could hop on a water taxi on our free afternoons and visit the surrounding towns of Lake Atitlan. Boy was I wrong!! There was so much more to this retreat…as I mentioned. It has been IMMERSIVE. I encountered my first Blue Lotus sound journey with the most beautiful man that I would liken to a very loving and kindhearted medicine man. Eddie smiled from ear to ear when you saw him and giggled as he spoke about the different qualities of the flowers that he worked with for the ceremony. He is not only an herbal medicine man, but also a musical medicine man. The array of instruments that he had prepared for this experience spanned across gongs, flutes, sitar, drums, mouth harps, throat singing and so much more.

Eddie and the beautiful flower altar he created for our Blue Lotus ceremony.

He had taken the afternoon before the ceremony, to prepare the tea for us and to create the beautiful flower and crystal altar. After the ceremony he would invite us to take parts of the altar with us and make our own little flower altars as a way to give gratitude to Mother Earth ‘Pachamama’ for the blue lotus medicine and the clarity she provides. It was all so intentional. So beautiful.

Then there was Victor. He is a Swedish man currently living in Costa Rica with his partner on a permaculture farm. He has a background in yoga, breathwork, photography, and ceremony. Together with Ben (our fearless leader for the retreat), they held so much space for every single one of the participants on this trip. They alternated teaching small groups of us for the restorative yoga nidra or gentle vin/yin classes, and both men were such powerful healers, it was impossible not to completely surrender and drop into these spaces with them.

Ben and Victor (left to right)

Getting ready for morning vinyasa with Ben Oliver

Victor led a ‘Clarity Breathwork’ ceremony a couple days into the retreat, in the morning for anyone who wanted to join. Of course, my 2 close friends and I (who had already decidedly fell in love with Victor’s nurturing and humble presence) immediately decided we would be there for it. None of us knew what to expect, nor did we have experience with breathwork focused ceremony. We were certainly in for an experience!!! All 3 of us had very individual experiences during the session, so I can only speak to the power of mine. Within 5 minutes of the breathwork, I was tingling all over and feeling heavy. Slowly, my hands and forearms began to completely cramp up, and I noticed that I couldn’t move. I felt paralyzed from the face down. My mouth was stuck in a perma-grin from ear to ear…it was WILD. At some point I thought my upper body would be locked up like this forever, and the thought of that triggered an uncontrollable laugh that made my chest bounce up and down off the floor beneath me. Of all things to give me such a profound mental and physical experience…breathing. WOW. I just can’t overstate enough how wild this was. There was a very strong pull towards seeing myself as a teacher in the world of healing arts and following this path very very deeply and passionately.

Paola was another healer from the retreat center who was kind of the leader of the different ceremonies and scheduling with the other healers on staff. She was a strong and wise woman from Oaxaca. While her brow was in a constant furrow, her heart was kind and extremely open. We had the opportunity to experience a ‘compassionate Mayan sweat lodge ceremony’ with her one of the days. Paola described this as a compassionate option, to make it more accessible to everyone at the retreat. We would be offering prayers and reverence to someone or something during the ceremony, by acknowledging them/it via the 4 doors (Earth, Water, Fire, and Air). Paola said she would be offering prayers and gratitude for all of her relations. Her family, friends, and loved ones…her relations.

There was a groundsman who had been cooking lava rocks from the surrounding volcanoes around the lake, in a fire pit nearby, to prepare for the sweat lodge. He brought several piping hot rocks in 2 by 2 with a pitchfork, as Paola used a pair of deer antlers to help offload them into the center of the lodge, dabbing resin of frankincense and herbs on top to offer prayer and gratitude, to each stone. When we had several stones in the center pit, Paola had the groundsman shut the door, and we began the corresponding ‘door’. Having it be a 'compassionate' sweat lodge ceremony, we came outside from the stone sauna in-between each of the 'doors' and poured cold water on our heads and drank some herbal tea in the sunshine. This ended up being a 5-10 minute break, and then we went back into the sauna to continue on with the next 20-30 minute 'door'. We went around the circle inside the sweat lodge and individually offered up our words/affirmations/and prayers, giving a resounding 'Aho' to signal the end of our share-which means 'Amen' in Lakota. At the end of the ceremony, to close our circle, we passed a bowl of edible body scrub around to each person. The scrub was full of flower petals, coffee grounds, seeds, coconut oil, and herbs. Paola had us start to scrub our bodies from the heart out..all over (except for our faces and hair). Next, she passed around chunks of Aloe Vera leaf, that was split in the middle and we scooped out the meat to coat our hair and faces with. Paola laughed as we sat there, unable to open our Aloe coated eyelids, and told us we all had the 'after-birth' look going on. She had BIG grandfather energy. Tough as nails, but her spirit was vulnerable and gentle and loving. Paola and her close friend, Andrew, who was helping her with the ceremony, led us down to the lake where we washed ourselves off and 'rebirthed' anew. It was perfect. It was powerful.

There were so many more wonderful and powerful experiences during the week, that I would love to share with you all when I see you next, but the most important and noteworthy of them all was the amount of bonding and connection I got with my 2 girlfriends. As women, as mothers, we don't take enough time to connect with our tribe. We either feel guilty for taking time away from our families, or we feel obligated to invest our free time into building our business or making progress with our education or fitness goals. What it comes down to, in many cases, is not putting enough value on deep connected time with the people who fill our cups. I can have a million things on my to-do lists that keep me occupied and feeling fulfilled, but it's not the same as making the time to connect. We don't do much in the United States in the way of ceremony and being with these 2 amazing women and living a very ceremonial life for a week amongst the Lago Atitlan, the mountains surrounding it and the rich culture of the ancient Mayans was soul rejuvenating. My cup is full and I am ready to continue serving all of you in the realm of the healing arts. This is truly my calling and I feel it stronger than ever.